Aunt Peg Frost

Howdy,

A Very sad moment.......

Aunt Peg Frost passed quietly to the other side this morning at 5 AM.........

Two days before her 85 Birthday........

Peg was one of the nicest ladies you would ever want to meet.......

Lots of Love to her and her family,
Roy and Joan

Puns

>1. The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He  >acquired his size from too much pi.  > >2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out  to be  >an optical Aleutian .  > >3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.  > >4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a  >weapon of math disruption.  > >5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.  > >6. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.  > >7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum  >Blownapart.  > >8. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.  > >9. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.  > >10. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.  > >11. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the  >other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.'  > >12. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.  > >13. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'  > >14. A backward poet writes inverse.  > >15. In a democracy it's your vote that counts.  In feudalism it's your count  >that votes.  > >16. If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you'd be in Seine .  > >17. A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess  >looks at him and says, 'I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per  >passenger.'  > >18. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says 'Dam!'  > >19. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft.  >Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and  >heat it too.  > >20. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' The other says  >'Are you sure?' The first replies, 'Yes, I'm positive.'  > >21. Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal?  >His goal: transcend dental medication.  > >22. There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at  >least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.

--  New Truck Camper on Order it will look a lot Like This: http://www.cheyennecampingcenter.com/TC1000  http://picasaweb.google.com/waccamawmacclub/CorningMuseumOfGlass

A TEST FOR OLD KIDS

A TEST FOR OLD KIDS

I was picky who I sent this to. It had to be those who might actually remember. So have some fun my sharp-witted friends. This is a test for us 'old kids'! The answers are printed below, but don't cheat.

01.After the Lone Ranger saved the day and rode off into the sunset, the grateful citizens would ask, Who was that masked man? Invariably, someone would answer, I don't know, but he left this behind. What did he leave behind?________________.

02.When the Beatles first came to the U.S. .In early 1964, we all watched them on The_______________ Show.

03'Get your kicks,__________________.'

04..'The story you are about to see is true. The names have been changed to___________________.'

05.'In the jungle, the mighty jungle,________________.'

06. After the Twist, The Mashed Potato, and the Watusi, we 'danced' under a stick that was lowered as low as we could go in a dance called the '_____________.'






07.Nestle's makes the very best . .. . ._______________.'

08.Satchmo was America 's 'Ambassador of Goodwill.' Our parents shared this great jazz trumpet player with us. His name was _________________.

09.What takes a licking and keeps on ticking?_______________.

10. Red Skeleton's hobo character was named __________________ and Red always ended his television show by saying, 'Good Night, and '________________. '

11.Some Americans who protested the Vietnam War did so by burning their______________.

12. The cute little car with the engine in the back and the trunk in the front was called the VW. What other names did it go by?____________ &_______________.

13.In 1971, singer Don MacLean sang a song about, 'the day the music died.' This was a tribute to___________________.

14.We can remember the first satellite placed into orbit. The Russians did it. It was called ___________________.

15. One of the big fads of the late 50's and 60's was a large plastic ring that we twirled around our waist. It was called the________________.


ANSWERS :
01..The Lone Ranger left behind a silver bullet.
02.The Ed Sullivan Show
03.On Route 66
04.To protect the innocent
05.The Lion Sleeps Tonight
06.The limbo
07.Chocolate
08.Louis Armstrong
09.The Timex watch
10.Freddy, The Freeloader and 'Good Night and God Bless.'
11.Draft cards (Bras were also burned. Not flags, as some have guessed)
12.Beetle or Bug
13.Buddy Holly
14.Sputnik
15.Hoola-hoop

Send this to your 'old' friends, (better known as Seniors.) It will drive them crazy ! And keep them busy and let them forget their aches and pains for a few minutes

--  Google Voice no longer requires an invitation..  Sign in using your Gmail Account... http://google.com/voice  I have one landline telephone number in New York, one in  South Carolina and 2 cellphones and I use Google Voice  to ring all the numbers at the same time....   Really, Really Cool.... 

What Women Want in a Man

What I Want In A Man!    Original  List

1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially successful
4. A caring listener
5. Witty
6. In good shape
7. Dresses with style
8. Appreciates finer things
9.. Full of thoughtful surprises

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 32)
1. Nice looking
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries


What  I Want in a Man, Revised List (age  42)
1. Not too ugly
2. Doesn't  drive off until I'm in the car
3. Works steady - splurges on dinner out  occasionally
4. Nods head when I'm talking
5. Usually remembers  punch lines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8. Knows not  to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat  down
10. Shaves most  weekends

What  I Want in a Man, Revised List (age  52)
1. Keeps hair in nose and ears  trimmed
2. Doesn't belch or  scratch in public
3. Doesn't  borrow money too often
4. Doesn't  nod off to sleep when I'm venting
5. Doesn't re-tell the same joke too many  times
6. Is in good enough shape  to get off the couch on weekends
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear
8. Appreciates a good TV dinner
9. Remembers your name on occasion
10. Shaves some weekends

What  I Want in a Man, Revised List (age  62)
1. Doesn't scare small children
2. Remembers where bathroom is
3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
5. Remembers why he's laughing
6. Is in good enough  shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears some clothes
8. Likes soft foods
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Remembers that it's the weekend

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age  72)
1. Breathing.
2. Doesn't miss the toilet.

-----------------

AFTER  BEING MARRIED FOR 44 YEARS, I TOOK A CAREFUL  LOOK AT MY WIFE ONE  DAY  AND SAID, "Darling, 44 YEARS AGO WE HAD A CHEAP  APARTMENT, A CHEAP  CAR,  SLEPT ON A SOFA BED AND WATCHED A 10-INCH BLACK  AND WHITE TV, BUT I GOT  TO SLEEP EVERY NIGHT WITH A HOT 25-YEAR-OLD  GIRL. 

NOW  I HAVE A $500,000.00 HOME, A $45,000.00 CAR,  NICE BIG BED AND PLASMA SCREEN  TV, BUT I'M SLEEPING WITH A 65-YEAR-OLD WOMAN.  IT SEEMS TO ME THAT YOU'RE NOT HOLDING UP YOUR SIDE OF  THINGS."

MY  WIFE IS A VERY REASONABLE WOMAN.  SHE TOLD ME TO  GO OUT AND FIND A HOT 25-YEAR-OLD  GAL, AND SHE WOULD MAKE SURE THAT I WOULD ONCE  AGAIN BE LIVING  IN A CHEAP APARTMENT, DRIVING A CHEAP CAR,  SLEEPING ON A SOFA BED AND  WATCHING A 10-INCH BLACK AND WHITE  TV.


AREN'T  OLDER WOMEN GREAT? THEY REALLY KNOW HOW TO SOLVE  YOUR MID-LIFE  CRISIS

===========================================================

Credit Card at the Gas Pump

Using credit/debit card to purchase gasoline? Read this note very
carefully. I did not know about the clear button, but I will be pushing
the clear button before I swipe my gas or debit card and after just to
be safe.

People are getting really desperate due to the constantly rising gas
prices. A friend just told me about something that happened to one of
his coworkers.

She used her credit/debit card to purchase gas at the pump (like most
of us do). She received her receipt like normal.

However, when she checked her statement, there were two $50 charges
added in addition to her purchase. Upon investigation, she found out
that because she did not press the 'clear' button on the pump, the
employee inside the store was able to use her card to purchase his/her
own gas!

To keep this from happening, after you get your receipt, you must press
the 'CLEAR' button or your information will be stored until the next
customer inserts their card.


I had never noticed the clear button but I got gas the other day and
sure enough it is there. I shall be using it from now on.

'Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I'm eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?'

The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn't already know. I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder. 

I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that lit up her entire being.. 

She said, 'Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I'm eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?' 

I laughed and enthusiastically responded, 'Of course you may!' and she gave me a giant squeeze.. 

'Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?' I asked. 

She jokingly replied, 'I'm here to meet a rich husband, get married, and have a couple of kids...' 

'No seriously,' I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age. 

'I always dreamed of having a college education and now I'm getting one!' she told me. 

After class we walked to the student union building and shared a chocolate milkshake. 

We became instant friends. Every day for the next three months we would leave class together and talk nonstop. I was always mesmerized listening to this 'time machine' as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.. 

Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went. She loved to dress up and she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students. She was living it up. 

At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet. I'll never forget what she taught us. She was introduced and stepped up to the podium. As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by five cards on the floor. 
 

 

 Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said, 'I'm sorry I'm so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me! I'll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell you what I know.' 

As we laughed she cleared her throat and began, ' We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing. 

There are only four secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success. You have to laugh and find humor every day. You've got to have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die. 

We have so many people walking around who are dead and don't even know it! 

There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up. 

If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don't do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old. If I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight. 

Anybody! Can grow older. That doesn't take any talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding opportunity in change. Have no regrets. 

The elderly usually don't have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets..' 

She concluded her speech by courageously singing 'The Rose.' 

She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily lives. At the year's end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those months ago. 

One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep. 

Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it's never too late to be all you can possibly be. 

When you finish reading this, please send this peaceful word of advice to your friends and family, they'll really enjoy it! 

These words have been passed along in loving memory of ROSE. 

REMEMBER, GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL. We make a Living by what we get. We make a Life by what we give. 

God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage. If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it. 

1-800-4664-411

1-800-4664-411


Google has done it again
Not everybody has On Star, etc. or a phone book handy.  Look what Google is doing....




Here is something you will want to have and use!  I still remember when the telephone company charged me $1.50 to get a phone number from information.  My compliments to Google!  Leave it up them to come up with something like this!!!


Here's a number worth putting in your cell phone, or your home phone speed dial:

1-800-goog411.

 

This is an awesome service from Google, and it's free -- great when you are driving on the road with no pen, pencil or paper handy. Don't waste your money on information calls and don't waste your time manually dialing the number. I am driving along in my car and I need to call the golf course and I don't know the number. I hit the speed dial for information that I have programmed.

The voice at the other end says, "City &State." I say, " Garland , Texas."

He says, "Business, Name or Type of Service." I say, “ Garland Golf Course."

  He says, "Connecting" and Garland Golf Course answers the phone.


How great is that? This is nationwide and it is absolutely free!
Click on the link below and watch the short clip for a quick demonstration.

http://www.google.com/goog411

--  I hope you have a nice day....